Readers Digest: some of my story…

I do have a potty mouth but only when I feel like it’s necessary or will make you laugh. So, you won’t see it on my “about me” page, but I won’t make any promises that you won’t see some adult language from time to time.

I moved out to California a couple days before I turned 18. I came from Alabama (Roll Tide!) with a closed mind and Fry Daddy in hand. If you don’t know what a Fry Daddy is, well, you and 18-year-old Alisha just couldn’t have been friends. Clearly, I had no idea what clean eating was, let alone the meaning of “organic.” My eyes were opened to what it looked like to eat healthy when I moved in with a very free-spirited, sweet, hippie, amazing woman I wish I would have been more open-minded to appreciate better. (Yes, we’re still friends). But that’s a story for another day. Seriously though, who knew a sleeve of Oreos isn’t good for you?! Mind. Blown.

When I moved out here I honestly thought I would make it back to Alabama and only be out here for a couple years. 15 years, one husband, four kids, and a dog later… I’m still here. 

My family life

I met my husband after living here for two days. I was going to school and worked part time at his gym. Long story short, we had an employee/boss relationship while I worked for him. But we worked together almost every day, so it was hard not to build some sort of friendship. When we no longer worked together, we became better friends and then ended up falling in love. He was my best friend through a really dark time. Another story for another day. 

We have two boys together. We also have two older kids, whom I’ll refer to as the “older kids” (a 23-year-old boy and 21-year-old girl) from my husband’s previous marriage. Let’s get the kids’ age difference out of the way now – my husband is 10 years older than me. Insert big eye emojii.  I’m not really old enough to have kids that old, but somehow, he still gets carded and I don’t. During those times, I make sure whoever is doing the carding knows I am younger by 10 years and they should be fired. That sounded harsh. I don’t try to get anyone fired, but I do let them know because…. Rude. Wow, that escalated quickly. Let’s get back on track. 

I don’t think there will be many “stories” with the older kids, not because I don’t care and they aren’t a big part of our lives, because they are. But more so because they are old enough to have friends who can see this, and I would never want them to feel like I’m putting their lives on display. If I do have them on here, it’ll be because they were okay with it, OR it’s my process through whatever circumstances are present and really doesn’t have anything to do with them but more with me. I also won’t air our dirty laundry, whether it has to do with any of my kids, my husband, friends, or anyone for that matter. Anything I feel that will help you will be shared with the utmost discretion and be approved by any and all parties involved. Save the drama for yo’ mama!

I want you to know that whatever life throws at you, you can handle it and make it to the other side stronger than you were the day before.

I made a lot of mistakes prior to marrying my husband, A- L-O-T. High school Alisha was, in my eyes, a mean girl, kind of like Gretchen Weiners from Mean Girls. Looking back, maybe I was mean, or maybe I was just a teenage girl. I was definitely judgmental.  Regardless, I feel like I could have been better. I was young and didn’t know who I was. Simply put: I was reckless with people, their feelings, and myself to a certain extent. When I moved I was 3,000 miles away from my family. I was engaged but called off the wedding a month before the big day. Then, I was dating again. Next thing you know, I was married and an “instant mom” and thinking, “I can totally do this mom thing.” It was fun, everything I dreamed of, and it was EASY! Let me just tell you, being a mom to a 7 year old is a lot easier than being a mom to a newborn or a stepmom to a 16-year-old girl. Then, my parents got divorced and my world shattered. On the heels of that, I had a little boy and completely lost myself. I don’t think I ever knew who I was to begin with, so there’s also that. Then, I had another little boy and just kept digging myself a nice little hole.

I never felt like I had solid direction with my life. I never felt like I was good enough to just be Alisha. And who was Alisha? I was/am always attached to someone. My identity has always been “so and so’s friend,” “Debi and Rick’s daughter,” “so and so’s girlfriend,” “Isidro’s wife,”  “stepmom to the older kids,” “Mom of the Mendez boys” – I don’t think I’ve ever just been ME.  So, here I am at almost 30 years old, trying to find myself. (When this was written I was in my late 20s) And you’re welcome to join me for the ride. My life is full of happiness and joy. It is full of ups and downs. I promise to share the good and the bad.

This was written back in 2017 when I first started as a food blogger. I moved it over to my rebranded site so you could see where I started and edited out the parts about food and updated ages, etc. I will probably talk more openly and more candidly about almost all aspects of my life with still keeping in mynd keeping my kids and our relationships safe. SO much has happened since 2016/2017 when I first set out to impact peoples lives and if I've learned anything it's that my story was meant to help bring freedom to other women.